On Race and Gender in this Election

On Gender and Race in this Election

By Angeles J. Maldonado, PhD in Education, Leadership, and Policy Studies from Arizona State University

If Bernie wins, great news.  It will signify a win for progressives.  However, if Hillary wins I will be particularly happy and genuinely optimistic.  As a mother and a woman, it's clearly time to see a woman be president.  Yet voicing this very thought around the sea of self-proclaimed progressives can mean exposing ourselves to shame and even ridicule.  On social media, it would be nice to see more posts indicating why Bernie is the best candidate as opposed to post after post about why Hillary is not.  There is so much unspoken and loud sexism around this election.  So much so, that it has became increasingly difficult to bear witness to the vast amount of abuse that Hillary continues to face, especially from Bernie supporters.

I have seen more posts from Bernie fans bashing Hillary than I have seen posts bashing Trump, and even less bashing Cruz or any other Republican candidate.  Recently, I have become particularly annoyed at the posts praising Bernie's wife, brings me back to women studies 101.  It seems to me that we are more comfortable embracing a woman as First Lady than the threat of a woman President.  But gender doesn't matter here, it's all about the issues we tell ourselves. I don't buy it.  

Gender like Race DO matter.  It's appalling how we can't even recognize what a huge deal it is to see a woman fight her way to the top, Hillary has managed to do that, but we don't care to contextualize her actions, we don't see her as courageous or strong or fierce we see her as a bitch because she did this and that and this.  I think if we want to find a reason not to like her we will find plenty, but what's sad is that an unconscious reason why she's not good enough, for many, has to do with her gender.  

Politics is a dirty game and to me everyone out there is dirty in some way, they are all performing trying to say the right thing to get elected, none of these people really care about us.  That doesn't mean we shouldn't care but I think we need to keep in mind that whoever wins will not resolve our lives, it's up to our community to pressure all candidates to care enough to bring our issues to the forefront.  

I believe the trump enthusiasm is but a reaction and revenge to Obama's historic win as the first Black President.  White supremacy is fighting back.  In the same way dismantling patriarchy continues to remain secondary, because we have more important issues to confront and gender equality alone is unimportant and laughable, it's a past issue.  

As a mother, gender equality matters to me. Hillary winning is a symbolic and necessary win for women, for moms, working moms, stay at home moms, women who spread themselves thin to accomplish their goals despite the many challenges setup expecting them to fail. I want my sons to grow up respecting and seeing women as equals not as secondary beings whose sole job is to serve and attend to the needs of men. 

As a college student I most likely would have voted for Bernie, he says all the right things.  But at this point in my life I want someone who embodies change not just proclaims it.  It's never been easy to be a woman and this election continues to prove exactly why.   The attacks out there against women are not just embarrassing but shameful.  

So while Obama has a horrible track record of deportations and other issues, I'm nonetheless glad he became President because he brought change even if only symbolic, which is many times more important than we care to recognize.  Leadership is always symbolic.  Which is why I long to see more people of color and women and LGBTQ people in positions of power, because we need people that look like us as role models, as symbols and placeholders that illustrate hope that things are changing.  

Given all of this, I continue to be amazed at how crazy people are getting to support yet another white man to power.  I understand the fact that he appears to be the most progressive of candidates, and therefore am sincerely glad his support is increasing, but what I fail to understand is why it’s necessary to be so nasty towards Hillary.  If you are so progressive, then shouldn't for that very reason “self-proclaimed” liberals ought to restrain yourselves from such sexist and aggressive attacks? Focus on why your candidate is the best "man" for the job, and that is precisely where the issue lies.

Dr. Maldonado is a mother and activist scholar whose research focuses on Immigration, Border Crit Theory, and Discourse within the immigrant rights movement in her home state of Arizona.

Financial Planner

So, we just got back from meeting with a financial planner, Ray and I.  Let me just tell you.  Frustrated is an understatement.

Let me back up. Ray is required as part of his bar license requirements to have his finances in shape.  It makes sense, you wouldn't want your attorney to be someone irresponsible right? So, in order to prevent this from happening, the state requires that attorneys have their finances in good standing.

Needless to say, coming from a background of low economic means, this is a task that is very difficult for students of color.  Anyhow, both him and I have spent a lot of time in school and well using up our government's generous student loans, which are now as he has graduated and me coming close to it, coming back to hunt us. 

At any rate, we had to to go meet with a financial planner/ advisor to go over our finances, budget, debt, etc. and help us out with this endeavor.  So we were blatantly honest with her, because, well frankly, both Ray and I are pretty tired of living check to check and also since we intend to try to have a baby again, well its kind of important for us to get it together. 

So there we were.  It was kind of romantic actually.  Ray and I, talking about our future.  But then out of no where things took a strange turn for us.  I was expecting to get some slack over how much we spend on direct tv, cell phones, etc. but the last thing I imagined was having the benefit of my education to be questioned.

I currently don't have a job.  but like many women, i do work, although it's not socially recognized.  I am pursuing my phd at ASU (I'm in the comps and soon dissertation stage).  So other than my student hat, I pretty much spend the rest of my time either taking care of our home, cleaning, cooking, and or volunteering at the migrant center in Naco.  I feel like I do a lot, but I enjoy it.  Most of my previous "jobs" were in the public sector, working at nonprofits or labor unions.  But when I met Ray, he really encouraged me to start focusing on school and finish my degree.  (I am so grateful for that opportunity)

But anyway, sitting there in that room with her, a room full of beautiful paintings, exposed brick walls, stylish shiny wood floors, I felt so mediocre and alone.  Particularly, when the financial planner turned to me and said, "well if you plan to have a baby, perhaps you need to just quit school now so you can start building a cash reserve."  And me, well I was schocked.  But the agony continued.

She continued to tell us that we had no means for having a baby right now, but she understood that emotional needs were just as important as financial ones, so in that case I should consider quitting school since I intend on being a mother, and if I want to be a stay at home mom, well my degree would have no financial value to us.

Now, I dont know yet what I want to do.  Be a stay at home mom or a career woman with a phd.  Both of these endeavors have proved so difficult already, that I'm still trying to get to the part of being able to visualize my graduation date and/or actually carrying a baby to term.  Arghh! It's difficult! 

The thing is, I never decided to go to school because of money.  I dreamt of going to school because I love to learn.  There is no alternate agenda for my desire to earn a degree.  I'm not trying to climb any latters or have it be a stepping stone to something greater.  An education is something that I find to have value in and of itself, irregardless of any financial benefit to my life.  And yes, on top of that goal/dream, I am dying to be a mother. 

While I was pregnant I got to experience how wonderful it feels to expect a baby.  To long so much for your little angel to arrive.  I'm still waiting for that day to come. 

Until then, I find it almost annoying to even fathom what I want to do after that happens.  (It's like yelling omaha too early).  I know I want to be there for my child, to be at home to help with their homework, tell him/her about the unjust world around them, and well just play with him/her, go to the park, make them a birthday cake...

So I guess if I had to pick right now, I would say I want to be a stay at home mom with a phd.  In the future, I might change my mind.  I know that doesn't fit into a perfect mold or a perfectly packaged box with a label that people can understand, certainly not the financial planner.  But, not everything has to make sense, it can just be what it is. another contradiction. and that's perfectly okay with me.
and with Ray (who loves me).

According to Ray, we will live our lives how we choose. Even if it means we live in a shack.  And that's perfectly okay with me (who loves him).

I never wanted to be married or have children.  but with ray, it's different, I want it all.  And, I think I'm pretty lucky to have a supportive husband, and I of course, support him all the way.  no matter what he wants to do.  I never want us to be people that do things they don't enjoy doing.  we have that agreement between us.

So yeah, it can be romantic to plan the future, responsible even, but sometimes, it's just nicer to live in the now.  afterall, isn't that the only thing we can really ever own? the now?

I think so.